Wednesday, May 31, 2006

a letter of love

lately gods had it on my heart to encourage my little sister shani. and today i remembered this letter that she gave me wen i left china to come back to perth in 2005.

Heya Carrie
Well what do i say? ive really had a great time while you've been here. And hope you did too! youll have to come sometime in the summer next time! cos t heres so much more to do! well the time sure did fly by. your out right now...teaching your last class. hope it was a good one. i was talking to lacey today and she was saying how she hasnt got a big sister and how lucky i am to have one. especially one like you. and she is sooo right. Although your strange at times your everything a little sister needs. and you've effected everybody youve met here in such a HUGE way! im realy gonna miss u! your such a little ray of sunshine ya know? anyways, hope you liked the dress and you have a good birthday okey? and i hope everything works out with university, your car and jeans west.make sure you write heaps!!! and send my love to everyone in Australia! have a good flight! seeya soon! and have a good time!
love always, shani.

its so crazy reading that. it breaks my heart yet makes me smile at the same time. i love shani and miss her so much.
SHANI-BANI I LOVE U! ...and im sorry that i called u 'nike poo' and 'naked monkey girl'...hehe.

Monday, May 29, 2006

i cant think of a title

hm it sure has been a long time since ive posted on here. or at least it feels like it
life sure is busy. it seems the lists are never ending of all the stuff that needs doing - yet i still end up here, on my computer, starting at the screen blankly - or eagerly if im distracting myself with ebay.
its week 11 at uni for me and on wed my last assignment is due for the semester so i am excited about that being over with. handing in my 2nd last one tmrw, i just finished it then - hope its good enough!
i am so so looking fwd to the break. i am so over uni right now. and i dont like feeling this way.i have been really disorganised these last few months so i have started back using a diary again and already i feel beta, cos ive sat down and looked at wot i must do and been able to see how much time i can actually spare if im wise with the time that i use.
i spoke to my family on msn tonight though and that was nice. i knew it was my dad when he said "hello treasure" - only my dad calls me that :-) my mum calls me goldy or sweeties. hehe.
no one seems to have heard from any of my older brothers in months, and so concern is growing. i am sure they are ok. but yeh - looks like none of them called mum for mothers day then which wasnt very nice. man i even called my brothers wives for mothers day yet my brothers cudnt even call mum? pretty sad. anyway, i hope they get their acts into gear. today was one of their birthdays. but i thought it was tmrw,so i will give him a call - or try. will probably just leave a msg like usual. "hi its carrie, ur sister, remember me?" lol

life is so full of ups and downs and u never know wots going to come next. the only constant - ive discovered is that god is always there. whether i choose to notice him is up to me. i tell u, if god was human he'd suffer badly from rejection and low self esteem cos he can be taken for granted sometimesi think. but i am working on fixing that each day :-)
im just blah blahing here. i think i need to just blah for a while. its nice to just sit here and spill.

today my flat mate kristy came home with a boost bar for me (MY FAVE CHOC BAR!) and a note that said "to my carrie, i just wanted to BOOST you on for god, he is amazing, live in his word buddy. love ya, kristy" HOW LOVELY! and i enjoyed it so much cos ive been trying not to eat them as much, so it was a real treat!

another nice thing that has happened is that im going to the mercy ball! yay! i really wanted to go but cudnt afford it, but now someone is taking me and im really excited. i think it will be a really fun night! anna and ruthie will be there and reeze too. shud be alot of laughs! ...but now wot to wear? hehe. oh the dilemnas in life.

you know ur blessed wen the biggest stress of ur day is discovering ur ball dress doesnt fit anymore
haha
praise god that i have enough food to make me bigger
hahaha

Friday, May 12, 2006

learning new things

"Leadership Challenge"
i have been given these lately by my leader....little tasks to complete with my girls in order to grow and challenge me and help me to see wot my true potential is
but, it seems a genuine, gut wrenching, heart aching "leadership challenge" was on my doorstep this week.
it was real
it twisted my insides
it made me cry
it hurt me
but - i pulled thru
and god is good. he heals and he stretches and grows us. and helps us to see how "the end of the world" is actually just a little life lesson.
hopefully these 'lessons' wont turn into weekly tutorials!!!
aaahh!!
:p

Thursday, May 11, 2006

some ppl

some people are interesting
today somebody was telling me about an incident that had occured recently which made them cry, because they felt like an orphan when ppl blessed them with money or food as they are living out of home and are a student (this generally makes a person POOR!)
how it made her feel like an orphan ill never know
yet i was kind of shocked to hear this person saying all of this...in front of two people who only get to see their family a few times a year-if at all.
it costs her $10 to go and visit her parents
it wud cost me over $1000
im not trying to turn this all back to me and say "well excuse me! im more orphan-ated than u!!"
it just annoyed me a little i guess. plus i really miss my family atm.
some people do not consider their audience before they open their mouths